I finally surrendered and raised the white flag to the Twitter Kingdom.

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mood music

MP3: The Weeknd – House of Balloons.zip

I’ve been giving The Weeknd serious rotation for a week now, and I can sum it up no better than a friend of mine’s tweet-like review:

“That shit was tight Got me thinking bout raping his voice”

Such simple eloquence.
Crushing on her and crushing on this Canadian duo.

Extra  Credit:  Cassie – Must Be Love (Jacques Greene’s Marriage Proposal Remix)

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lazy sunday thoughts: Rats, Paris and Cooking

Leave it to Pixar to make me re-position my views on rats and the French.

New back-up plan: Move to Paris, become a chef, fall in love with rebel, biker chick.

Relevant: Rats, New York and Graffiti and ratONAsubway

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One Night Stands and Confidentiality Agreements

Now that I have your attention, please read the rest of my post?

Not the impeachment worthy topic it was when I was growing up (Lewinsky-Gate, anybody?), but SEX! (got your attention yet?) is still kind of a hush-hush topic between me and my friends:

Personally,  I don’t think truer words have ever been spoken about the way guys talk about sex (or at least the dudes I hang out with).  Fuck that Entourage bullshit.  My friends and I have never gathered together for brunch the morning after to discuss the  details of what goes on under the sheets while cracking wise about each other’s sub-par sexual performances.  There’s just too much homo-erotic undertone (Excuse me? But, why would I want one of my male friends paint me a mental picture of them sweatily flopping on some random, unknown, faceless female?) for my tastes, not that there’s anything wrong with that! If you’re a guy that brags about your sex life in detail with your friends, then I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your friends hate you.  Actually, I’m sorry, that was a lie.  I relished telling you that.  Does spreading your tall tales of your “wild night” validate the experience for you? If you have sex and don’t post a status update on Facebook, did it really happen?


As Marshall notes in the above clip; comparing men and women, I find that my female friends are more prone to “salty sailor talk.”  My first few forays into such frank conversations, I was taken aback when I heard  such candid, graphic and detailed talks about sex.  Nowadays, I don’t even bat an eye anymore when a female friend comes to me to discuss the logistics of juggling multiple partners, the satisfactory amount of post-coitus cuddling, the proper etiquette of waiting your turn during threesomes or the self-esteem boosting properties of a one night stand.  What can I hope to accomplish by talking to dudes about my sex life other than uncomfortable awkward silences and the occasional head nod?  Ladydudes, on the other hand, are a veritable treasure trove of valuable insider information.  What kind of practical advice could a guy share about sex, and would you even really want to follow said advice?  Conversely, why wouldn’t I go directly to the source and get some answers, tips and tricks straight from the horse’s mouth?

But, that’s not what I came here to talk about either.

One night stands.

Discovered by Baby Boomers, experimented by Generation X, but perfected and transformed into a national past-time by Millennials, one night stands have gone from social taboo to a social ubiquity.  The changing cultural viewpoint can be seen reflected through the evolution of television programming since I was a kid growing up in the 90s.  As a first-generation immigrant, I spent many of my formative years plopped in front of a television; my teacher when it came to the study of American pop culture.  I wasn’t just watching Saturday morning cartoons either, I was tuning in every Thursday night for NBC’s Must See TV as far back as grade school (The first U.S. television sitcom I ever watched was a Betamax bootleg of The Simpsons episode, “The Telltale Head,” when I was 3 years old). I had NO clue what they were talking about in a lot of the episodes at the times of original viewing, and looking back I now realize how much writers had to rely on double entendres and sneaky winks at the audience (Eg: Master of Your Domain) to get away with jokes about things of a sexual nature.  Nowadays, the subject of one night stands aren’t just accepted or organically integrated into television and film, it’s in your face and promoted heavily (Source: Every reality show EVER made).

But I’m also not here to discuss the current, sad state of popular television and film.  And you didn’t make it this far to read some unemployed-film-school-graduate crackpot thesis.
Sorry, I tend to run away on tangents sometimes.
Like that time I ran away from those cops.
Boy, that was a helluva night.
You’d think that drunk and athletic always outruns fat and old, you’d be surprised.
Oh, right.

I will caveat the remainder of this post by saying I am by no means a casanova, nor have I bedded a disgusting impressive amount of females (Fun Fact: The number of partners I’ve had can be counted on one hand.) However, I have had the pleasure of experiencing at least one one night stand during those 1-5 occasions, and I must say, contrary to my previous beliefs, it was an extremely liberating and enlightening experience.  In the past, I had always tried to avoid one night stands, mostly because of some misguided attempt at remaining “pure” and “respecting my partner.”  How young and naïve I was.

When entered cautiously and done with great care, one night stands can be amazing, stress-relieving and down-right unadulterated, carnal pleasure.  In my limited experience, what separates bad sex from good sex from great sex is all about the emotional states of the parties involved (and always remember to be vocal, even a grunt or moan every now and then will suffice).  To ensure the maximum amount of utility, its best to leave all hangups and insecurities outside the door.  There is nothing more boner killing less sexy than trying to get romantic but having to constantly assure the other person that I really don’t care that you “didn’t have time to get a Brazilian wax earlier” or how you “wish how you could get rid of these stretch marks.”  Granted, in my early years, I was guilty of the same timid and insecure charges.

It wasn’t until I found myself in a complete stranger’s apartment 10,000 miles away from home at 5AM (CST) when my mind flipped the switch.  My epiphany came in some beautiful woman’s bed halfway across the world (not the only thing that came that night, *wink wink nudge nudge*). I realized that I could be as adventurous, vulnerable and uncensored as I wanted to be.  After all, other than the exchange of names (and bodily fluids… HIYOOOO!!), I had no information about her, and I knew that I would never see her again after I flew back home the following week.  That one night in Shanghai forever changed my outlook on sex, women and self-confidence.

Now, I don’t condone everybody to go out there and start trying to bed any willing, random stranger.  One night stands are still reserved for the mentally mature.  I’m talking about people that are completely aware of the purely physical nature of this activity, and can preferably also detach their emotions from the activity completely.  The probability of becoming infatuated and clingy increases with partners that have had little to no experience with sex.  Do your due diligence, make sure that you aren’t entering into an agreement with someone that is mentally unfit.  After all, that’s what one night stands are, a social contract agreed upon by two consenting adults for 2-12 hours of no strings attached fun.   If you believe you’re fit and stable enough to handle these ramifications and any consequences that may befall upon you, then go forth!  From my unofficial demographic survey, girls are just as willing as guys to engage in purely physical activities with no relationship or emotional connection involved (if not more so).

And no, I have not discussed any of this with any of my guy friends.  For all they know, I’m still a virgin.  I am currently, however, seeking advice from my female friends on the best method to find a down chick that’d be willing and is looking to have one night of fun.

Any takers?

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I guess subway meditation is more mainstream than I thought. I should look into trademarking…

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Chivalry is NOT dead (except on the G+E trains)

Hell yeah, A-Train.  Keeping it classy.


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Shit List Item #32: Weather

From sunshine to frozen.
The poor guy never had a chance… *tear*

WTF, weather? You used to be cool. You’ve changed, man..
I thought yesterday was the first day of Spring?

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